The sun continued to beat down on my sweat-drenched skin doing its best to wake up my stubborn soul and urge me to seek shelter inside. "The hottest day of the summer? Sure, I'll go for a run." I don't know why I decide to torcher myself in this way. But nothing could stop me, including the thickened humid air that tried to take away my breath at each inhale.
My feet continued to slam against the concrete. As a Georgia-Florida girl, I admit that I thrive in the summer heat, but on this particular day, I thought about caving into my body's commands. I felt weak, thirsty, and slap wore out. "Just keep putting one foot in front of the other, you will be fine, it's fine, everything is fine," I kept chanting to myself. As my mind and body kept fighting one another, my pace began to dwindle. However, just before I came to a screeching halt something magnificent happened...it started to rain.
"Praise the Lord, let it rain!" I shouted.
Maybe God thought, "This crazy girl isn't going to stop for nothing, so I better take care of her."
Isn't He so good?
The raindrops danced on my skin one by one until they quickened and began to march on my skin in unison. The sweat washed off my body, my overall temperature lowered, and my pace picked back up. Energized by the cooling watery droplets I was able to finish with more energy and more power than I started with.
Rain.
Most of us don't mind a good old rain, especially on a hot summer day.
My son loves a good ol' rainy day. When it rains he loves to gather the family together and cuddle up and watch movies.
Rain cools, cleanses, and when the sun is around and the two of them hug...a rainbow is formed reminding us of God's promises.
Most of us don't mind this type of rain. But what about the rain, the hard moments in our lives, when the rain comes when we least expect it and it's unwanted, unwelcomed even.
When these moments come are we saying, "Praise the Lord, let it rain!?"
The opposite is true. We shout things such as, "Why God!?" or "Where are You!?" or "How could You!?"
A year ago on this day, my mom was literally fighting for her life and I couldn't sleep. It was midnight and the Holy Spirit reminded me of one of her favorite songs "Healing Rain" by one of her favorite artists Michael W. Smith. I stumbled in the dark, down the stairs, and made my way to our school room. I put my headphones on, put the song on blast, fell to my knees, and poured out my soul in prayer as well as an ocean of tears. I pleaded for my mom's life. I begged God to save her and heal her on this earth.
The words resounded,
"Healing rain is falling down,
Healing rain is falling down,
I'm not afraid.
I'm not afraid."
"God let the healing rain fall on my mom right now and heal her in Jesus' name," I repeated over and over again.
With swollen eyes and a tired body, I prayed until I passed out.
The ringing of the phone broke through the 1:30 AM silence and I hesitated to answer. I reached over with shaken hands and answered. "She is no longer with us, sis. Mom is gone" my brother Travis' trembling voice revealed.
I couldn't breathe.
I didn't think I had any more tears to give but more came rushing down my face.
"God, why didn't you heal her? I trusted You would heal her. You said if we have the faith of a mustard seed we could say to a mountain move and it would move. God, I had faith. I have faith! Why her? Why my mom?"
I was reminded of the song. (The version I was listening to was connected to the song "Majesty.") I turned the song back on and listened as my whole world was falling apart;
"Healing rain is falling down,
Healing rain is falling down,
I'm not afraid.
I'm not afraid.
We're singing Majesty, Majesty,
Forever I am changed by Your love
In the presence of Your Majesty
We're singing Majesty, Majesty
Your grace, Your grace has found me just as I am
Empty handed but alive in Your hands."
In the middle of one of the most devastating moments in my life, I heard the Lord whisper in my spirit. The song you were singing to me wasn't to save your mom on this side of eternity. It was a message from your mom. She wanted you to know in the moments you were praying for her...Healing rain was falling down over her, she wasn't afraid, and at that moment she saw His Majesty. She saw Jesus."
Storms.
They come into our lives unwelcomed. They wreck us to our core. They leave us feeling empty, weary, washed-up, and abandoned.
But at this moment I realized that in one of the darkest moments/storms in my life, the sun was piercing through for my sweet momma, and she got to experience the rainbow. When I was praying for her life to be healed on this side of eternity, she was being healed and getting to see the face of Jesus.
Sometimes the storms/the darkest moments of our lives that we experience come so that other people can experience the rainbow.
Things don't always go the way we want them to. I desperately wish that my sweet momma was still with me. I miss her so much it hurts. I miss her talks, her mom-size encouragement and love, her stories when her country accent got thicker the longer she talked, her hugs, her laughter, our shopping adventures...everything.
But on this day, one year ago, my momma laid her eyes on her Savior. He wiped away every tear from her eyes, took away all of her pain and suffering, and all of the former things on this earth (her heart condition, her MS, and so much more) that she had been wrestling with were no more (Revelation 21:4).
My mom was free. My mom was fully alive.
(My mom is still free! My mom is still fully alive!)
AND If my storm meant that she could finally be completely healed and free...
LET IT RAIN
MICHAEL W SMITH - HEALING RAIN/MAJESTY:
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